Mohel :  frequently asked questions before a bris milah:

 

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Q: What is an appropriate gift when invited to a bris?

A: People who want to bring gifts do so because of their friendship with the parents, not as any "holiday" or "ritual" gift. Depending on ones relationship with the parents, one may get the parents a baby present (any baby stuff is okay), a Judaica present, or a Judaica baby present. An example of a Judaica baby present would be a small Kiddush cup or a bris pillow covering. More conventional items might be a prayer book. I usually suggest an "Artscroll Siddur" prayer book, or a mezuzah for the baby's room. Any Artscroll book may be purchased at artscroll.com, or go to a Judaica online store. Finally, you may help the family with the bris preparations, a present they may appreciate the most. (An Amazon link to an artscroll prayer book is http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/search-handle-url/index=books&field-keywords=artscroll%20siddur&bq=1/ref=aps_more_b_1/107-8267387-4384544 ) Finally, if one is close to the parents, try helping them with preparing the celebration. They will appreciate that more than anything you give them! I heard about a New York City "stockbroker" bris where someone gave the baby two shares of Microsoft, but I don't take that story seriously.

Q: What is the proper attire at a bris?

A: Since the bris ceremony is a life cycle event, and an important mitzvah, formal attire is appropriate.  During morning brisses, people often show up business casual.  If one does not know how formal the bris ceremony will be, dress formally (just in case).

Q: Do ten Jewish men (a minyan) have to be present at a bris?

A: A bris may be done without a minyan.  A minyan is preferable, just as Abraham performed his circumcision “in the middle of the day” to publicize the event, and create a sanctification of God’s name (“kiddush Hashem”).

Q: What is the typical fee for a mohel?

A: A Mohel’s fee varies from location to location, the range being between $400 to $800.  Many families cannot afford the minimum fees being young married couples without a steady income.  If they cannot afford the mohel’s fee they should inform him and the mohel will generally reduce his fee to accommodate them.

Q: What is the Pidyon Haben ceremony (‘redemption of the first born’)?

A: The Pidyon Haben ceremony is a biblical commandment that only applies to a baby boy who is also the first-born.  Follow this link for more details about this mitzvah: http://www.google.com/search?q=pidyon+haben

Q: What is traditionally done with the excised foreskin?

A: The foreskin is an object that has been part of a mitzvah, and similar to an unusable Torah scroll or tefillin, it requires burial.  A garbage disposal is not dignified and considered a disgraceful place to throw away an object of God’s imperative.

Q: What foods are traditionally served after the bris?

A: The celebration is usually a sit down meal with kosher food served.  Morning circumcisions often follow with dairy meals with bagels and lox.  Midday and afternoon circumcisions are either dairy or meaty, depending on the preference of the family.  There are some different customs among Sephardim.  Meals on Sabbath are traditionally non-dairy with challah rolls and Kiddush wine.

Q: What should the parents bring to the bris before the ceremony begins?

A: The parents should make sure that the following items are brought to the ceremony: At least two chairs, two cups, a table, a bottle of kosher wine, 3 prayer shauls (talis), a foot rest (approx. 6’’-12’’ high), six cotton diapers, liquid soap, and EMLA cream which may be prescribed by the doctor.

Q: What medical conditions may deter the date of the bris?

A: The mohel is primarily interested in three medical conditions that may push off the bris date: fever, jaundice, and eye infection. No bris may take place if the fever has reached a temperature of 99.5 degrees Fahrenheit (~37.5 degrees Celsius). Levels of jaundice can fluctuate from day to day. If the jaundice is 14 or above, then the bris must be postponed. If the level has stabilized or is going down at 12, then the bris may take place. With respect to levels of 13, the Halakha can vary from baby to baby. As a rule of thumb, whenever there is a question regarding the health of the baby and when to perform a bris, the mohel will ask permission from the parent’s doctor.

Q: May the father perform the bris?

A: According to Halakha, every Jewish father is supposed to circumcise his own son. Nowadays, the father usually wants a proxy to perform the circumcision as for him, so he appoints a mohel. Therefore, whenever the father requests to do the bris himself, I act not as a religious proxy, but as a circumcision helper. I perform all the preparations and set up everything so that the father simply has to do the one crucial act. Afterwards, I put the bandage on myself.

Q: Is the bris any different if the father is not present?

A: There are no differences in the bris ceremony when the father is absent, except that the mohel does not "ask" for permission from the father to act as a proxy.

Q: Why does the baby drink wine before the bris?

 

A: The baby is usually given a drop of wine (or grape juice) before the bris, to commemorate the drop of blood (redness of the wine) that he is giving to come in to the Jewish covenant. The wine also has the affect of calming the baby if he is crying. No wine is given if the parents do not wish so.

Q: What is the sandak?

A: The sandak is commonly translated as the godfather. This is the one who is holding the baby while the mohel is performing the bris. Usually, the sandak is the father, a grandfather, a best friend, or a respected rabbi in the community.

 

 

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